Book of the Four Lovers
by TheDuck
Summary: Final Chap 7 - the wedding. MTHN love chain. Someone's playing Love God. Can the universe of the four gods handle another ego so big? The Suzaku 7 are but mere mortals in this Curious Play.
1. The Proposal

Disclaimer: I don't not own Fushigi Yugi or any of the characters found in this fanfiction. If you happen to be the almighty creator, please don't sue me.  
  
  
  
  
  
(In this story, Nuriko is fully female. Don't ask me how it happened. If I figure it out, I'll write another fanfic to let you know.)  
  
  
  
~*~ Chapter 1:  
  
Yuuki Keisuke sat in his chair engrossed in the book he was reading. It was the Book of the Four Gods, the record of events in the Universe of the four gods. He was tracking the movement of his sister Miaka. She had just stepped into her room with Suzaku Seven Star warrior Tamahome. They had been kissing passionately before they crossed the threshold.  
  
"Darn, what's happening?" The words appearing in the book had abruptly stopped.  
  
"Doesn't it say?" asked Tetsuya. He tried looking over Keisuke shoulders but was nudged away.  
  
"No, don't look. I don't want you, or me, to know what's going on." He had already guessed the reason for the books break. Keisuke tried to remind himself that his sister was a big girl and beyond his control. Still she was his baby sister. She shouldn't be. "Argh, darn censorship," he mumbled, the line between Big brother and pervert blurring. ~*~  
  
Meanwhile in ancient China, lovers lay in each other's arms.  
  
"Oh, Miaka."  
  
"Tamahome," she purred in return.  
  
"Miaka, I- I love you." It came out as a faint whisper, but Miaka heard it loud and clear. This time her response was a kiss as sweet and erotic as chocolate. In that moment of heady bliss Tamahome lost his inhibition.  
  
"Marry me."  
  
"Oh, Tamahome." Miaka was so shocked she stopped what she was doing.  
  
Tamahome looked deeply into her eyes to prove his sincerity. Her shock turned to delight.  
  
"What took you so long?"  
  
The lovers returned to their embrace, this time wearing matching rings, each with a small red stone.  
  
~*~  
  
The next day, Miaka was bubbling with excitement she could barely contain. Oh, who to tell first? There was Yui, her best friend. But how was she going to talk to someone outside the book? Then Miaka remembered the ribbon from her school uniform. With her mind preoccupied with her engagement, Miaka had almost forgotten it. Her fingers reached up to search the intricate twists and braids styled on her head. Good, the ribbon was still in her hair. She rushed back to her room so she would have some privacy.  
  
"Yui. Yui can you hear me?" she called out tentatively into the ribbon.  
  
"Yes, Miaka." A voice answered. Miaka scrunched her face in confusion. The voice was deep like a man's. She tried again.  
  
"Yui, is that you?"  
  
"Miaka, it's me Keisuke."  
  
"Keisuke." Miaka was equally glad to hear from her brother. For some reason, she didn't think it was unusual for Keisuke to have Yui's ribbon. She was bursting to tell someone her good news.  
  
"Oh, Keisuke, Taka asked me to be his wife, and I said 'yes'. We're going to get married."  
  
"What!" Keisuke screamed into Yui's ribbon. "You can't. Emperor Hotohori has already proposed. You can't marry Tamahome. You have to marry Hotohori."  
  
"Why?" Miaka began to get suspicious. "There's something you're not telling me, isn't there?"  
  
"Well."  
  
"You better tell me what it is."  
  
"You see, I kind of, accepted Hotohori's proposal on your behalf. The contract is signed and sealed."  
  
"You what! You have no right to do that."  
  
"Actually, I do. As long as you're in the book, their rules apply. A suitor seeks the permission from the head of the family, the man of the house. I'm the man of the house, even if you're not physically here at the moment."  
  
"Arghh. I'm not talking to you anymore." Miaka undid the ribbon in her hair and left it on the bed before she stormed out of her room at the palace. She needed to think, so she headed to the kitchen.  
  
It was there that Tamahome found her an hour later. She was stuffing her face with anything her hands could grab hold off. It didn't look like she was going to stop anytime soon.  
  
"What's wrong, Miaka?"  
  
"Womgh?" Miaka's mouth was full. She swallowed long enough to repeat. "Nothing's wrong."  
  
Miaka dusted the crumbs off her dress. She picked up a chicken drumstick and was waving it wildly in front of her fiancé. "Nothing's wrong. I just need to see the Emperor." She continued to rant as she walked past Tamahome and out of the kitchen.  
  
Tamahome was simply to bewildered to follow her. "What am I getting myself into?" he asked himself.  
  
~*~ A minute later, in throne room:  
  
"How could you?"  
  
"I love you, Miaka." Hotohori knew straight away what Miaka was talking about.  
  
"I know you love me. I love you, too, but not in that way." Miaka soften at his heartfelt declaration, but it was not enough to completely extinguish her outrage. "That still doesn't explain why you signed a marriage agreement with my brother for my hand. Why did you go behind my back?"  
  
"I love you so much. I don't want to lose you to someone else when you go back to your world. I'm used to making decisions and giving commands.  
  
"That doesn't make what you did right. I don't want to marry you. Can't you just tear up that contract you made with Keisuke?"  
  
"No." Miaka was surprised at his answer.  
  
"Why not? You're the Emperor, aren't you?"  
  
"That is precisely the reason I can't annul the contract. The Emperor has to keep his word. How can my subjects trust me if I make a promise to marry you one day and break it the next?"  
  
"You're just being stubborn," she insisted.  
  
"I'm not being stubborn. I love you and always will."  
  
Miaka didn't know what else to say. Her silence was interpreted as hope to Hotohori, so he continued. "The announcements will be posted throughout the empire tomorrow. I wish you would be by my side when the banns are read."  
  
That sent fury skyrocketing inside her. Steam was coming out of her ears. Her face was now a bright red, and she found herself storming out the door. It seemed like she was doing that a lot this day.  
  
~*~  
  
Miaka had just made it far enough from Hotohori to calm down when *SMACK*  
  
"Miaka, how could you?" Nuriko sent her hand flying across Miaka's face. It was by sheer will that she restrained from putting her normal strength into the slap.  
  
Miaka was stunned. "What- what was that for, Nuriko?"  
  
"How could you? You know I'm in love with Hotohori. How could you agree to marry him? I thought we were friends."  
  
"We are friends, Nuriko. And I didn't agree to marry the Emperor. He and my brother decided for me."  
  
"Oh, what does it matter who arranged the marriage. Hotohori loves you and not me." Miaka wasn't sure, but it looked as if Nuriko was fighting back tears.  
  
"Well, if it's any consolation, I'm in love with Tamahome. We were planning on getting married before this whole Hotohori thing came up."  
  
The wheels in Nuriko's head began turning. "What if you went ahead and married Tamahome?"  
  
"No. That's not possible. The Emperor or the High Priest of Suzaku would have to approve the marriage. I don't think Hotohori is going to agree to it now, and the High Priest of Suzaku hasn't been seen in decades."  
  
"Actually, there are rumors that the High Priest has been seen in the vicinity of the Temple of Seiryuu. Anyway you don't need the approval of either of them if you were in your world."  
  
Miaka was beginning to catch on. "Yeah, Tamahome and I could elope. Now all we need is a way to get back to my world." She looked hopefully at her friend. "Nuriko, you wouldn't happen to know away, would you?"  
  
Nuriko looked thoughtful for a moment. "Some people say strange things happen in the enchanted forest of Mt. Leikaku. You could try there. It's on the way to Kutou and the Temple of Seiryuu. If you fail to find the way to cross over, at least you'll be headed towards the High Priest."  
  
Miaka was already planning what to pack. They would need lots of supplies, food especially. "Thanks, Nuriko."  
  
Nuriko smiled smugly at Miaka's retreating back. "Anytime, girl. Anytime."  
  
  
  
  
  
Taiitsu-kun: And so ends the first scene in this Suspicious Play  
  
  
  
A/n: this is my first Anime fanfic, so please, please with a cherry on the top, review. 


	2. The Escape

Chapter 2: The Escape  
  
  
  
  
  
"Mitsukake, I need your help," pleaded Miaka.  
  
"I can't do it. Do you know what the punishment is for deceiving the Emperor? Besides, Emperor Hotohori is a fellow Suzaku Seven Star warrior. I can't lie to him."  
  
"It wouldn't be lying," Miaka insisted. "I just need you to give me a sleeping potion and tell him that I can't see him because you have given me a sleeping potion. It's absolutely true."  
  
"What if he asks why I gave you a sleeping potion?"  
  
"Ummm, you could say I have some strange medical condition that can only be cured by hours of undisturbed rest."  
  
"Now, that would be lying."  
  
"No, it wouldn't. Because, because.I don't know." Miaka was drawing a blank so she decided to try switching tactics. "Please, Mitsukake. I really need you to help me stall Hotohori. Just buy us enough time, so Tamahome and I can elope. I don't want to marry Hotohori. I'm in love with Tamahome. You know how that feels. Wouldn't you do the same with Shoka, if you were in our position?"  
  
Miaka knew she had hit the right string when Mitsukake's expression changed. It was sad and wistful at the same time as he thought of his long time love.  
  
"All right. I'll help you. But I can't promise you I'll lie to the Emperor. "  
  
Miaka gave him a big hug. "Thanks. Oh, thank you so much, Mitsukake." She finished off the hug with a quick peck on the cheek. "I still need the sleeping potion."  
  
Mitsukake shook his head as he placed a small vial into Miaka's waiting palm, but kept a hold of it. "What are you going to do with it? This is a very potent mix. One drop will put the recipient into a deep slumber for at least six hours. Just half the bottle will totally knock him out. In that case he will need the antidote to awaken."  
  
"Don't worry," Miaka said as she plucked the vial from his fingers. "It's back-up, in case we need to feign dead." At Mitsukake's scowl she added. "Just kidding." ~*~ "Are you ready to go?"  
  
"Why are we doing this, again?" Tamahome was still a little fuzzy on the details of his elopement. Miaka had returned from her visit to the Emperor in a hurry to leave the palace. She had mentioned something about a royal betrothal being unethical, and announced that they were going to elope. She then proceeded to pack.  
  
"We're doing this because the only way we are going to get married is in my world or before the High Priest of Suzaku. How many times to I have to tell you?"  
  
"I see." Tamahome wasn't any clearer on the subject, but he let Miaka push him into the windy Konan night. Bad omen, thought Tamahome for a fleeting second. It was summer, and the nights were usually balmy. He stopped to observe the sky. It was cloudless, giving him a clear view of the seven constellations.  
  
"Come on, let's us. We have a schedule to keep." Miaka was using her head as a battering ram, trying to get Tamahome to move.  
  
"When did we get a schedule?" he asked absent-mindedly.  
  
"Stop talking and start walking." Miaka was now tugging on his arms, leading him forward.  
  
"Are you in a hurry or something?"  
  
"Hurry? No, I just want to make sure we get to the Enchanted Forest before the moon starts setting."  
  
"Well, that makes sense." Tamahome was now cooperating. Miaka let out a sigh of relief.  
  
~*~  
  
The night was half over, when Hotohori suddenly awoke. "The ring. I forgot to give Miaka her engagement ring."  
  
He rang the bell on his nightstand. A servant appeared almost immediately. "You rang, your Majesty."  
  
"Go forth and fetch Miaka."  
  
"Yes, sir. What should I tell her, sir?"  
  
"Just bring her here quickly. Tell her it's important. And one more thing," he added as an after thought, "Tell her I love her."  
  
"Yes, sir. As you wish, sir." The servant backed out of the royal chamber. It was only when he stood up outside that Chichiri's ever-smiling face was revealed in the moonlight. Two seconds later he disappeared into his kasa and reappeared in Miaka's room.  
  
"Hmm, not here." He made another quick trip to Tamahome's. "Not here either. Hmm, to tell or not to tell?- that is the question. This is a tough one." Chichiri feigned deliberation. "Tell, of course, no da." He changed his mask into one with an evil grin.  
  
Chichiri made one last visit to Chiriko's study. He found the scholar-boy resting on his desk, a stack of opened books as his pillow. Chichiri bent down to whisper into his ear. "Miaka has been kidnapped by Tamahome. Go tell the Emperor."  
  
Chichiri was gone by the time Chiriko began his sleepwalk to the Emperor. He could be heard chanting "Miaka has been kidnapped. Tamahome did it. Must tell Emperor," under his breath.  
  
He made it to the Royal Chamber and the guard standing watch over the entrance.  
  
"What do you want?" The guard ordered.  
  
"Must tell Emperor." Chiriko was still in a trance.  
  
"Tell the Emperor what?"  
  
"Miaka has been kidnapped."  
  
"The priestess of Suzaku has been kidnapped?! Who did it?"  
  
"Tamahome did it."  
  
"The Emperor must know about this."  
  
"Must tell Emperor."  
  
"Sure, right this way." The guard ushered Chiriko in.  
  
Hotohori was surprised to see Chiriko when he was expecting Miaka. However, he was first and foremost the Emperor. "How can I help you, Chiriko?"  
  
"Must tell the Emperor."  
  
Hotohori was only half-listening. He was after-all still a man and his thoughts were focused on a certain maiden. "Go ahead. By the way have you seen Miaka?"  
  
"Miaka has been kidnapped."  
  
"Kidnapped? That's impossible. She's in the palace." Hotohori was sure he had heard wrong. The land of Konan was currently experiencing a period of peace and prosperity. He couldn't think of anyone who would want to harm the Maiden of Suzaku.  
  
"Tamahome did it."  
  
Ah. Not an enemy of Konan or Suzaku but a rival in love. Hotohori was well aware of Miaka's feelings for the other warrior. Merely a passing interest on Miaka's part, he was sure.  
  
Hotohori knew instantly what he must do. "I must go and save Miaka and deal with the hooligan Tamahome myself."  
  
Turning to the guard he issued an order, "Ready my horse. I leave at once."  
  
Hotohori turned to seek more information from Chiriko, but the boy was sound asleep in the Emperor's bed. Given the circumstances Hotohori decided to let the infraction slide. He did, however, check under his pillow to make sure the royal hand mirror was not broken. Since he had it in his Hotohori took a look. "Still handsome as ever, even in the middle of the night," he declared himself.  
  
~*~  
  
Outside his window, Nuriko was watching the evening's events from behind a tree. This is not in the plan, she thought. "He's not supposed to go after them. How am I going to win his heart if he's not even here? This leaves me no choice. I have to follow him." Resolved, Nuriko prepared.  
  
~*~  
  
  
  
Taiitsu-kun: So ends this second act in this Stupendous Play.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
A/n: Love it or hate it, please review. Happy authors make efficient authors. Thanks to CAS & Pluto - I got some new ideas from you. And to Cerise. 


	3. The Chase

A/n: This chapter would have been posted sooner if Bakaru did not hog the computer. Also bare with the beginning, I was having a little problem with writer's block. It does get better. ~*~  
  
  
  
Chapter 3: The Chase  
  
Where are we? Miaka wondered. She and Tamahome had been wandering for what felt like ages. They had started out from the palace on foot but fortunately found a horse not too far into their journey. The horse was now spent from the hard ride up Mt. Leikaku, so Miaka and Tamahome were back on their feet.  
  
Miaka looked around. In the starlight, nothing looked familiar. Just where was the Enchanted Forest? Nuriko hadn't said.  
  
Tamahome was doing some exploring of his own. He was looking forward to getting some rest. And Miaka would need a place to prepare food. He knew how cranky she could get without a hot meal.  
  
"Tsk, tsk," a dismembered voice whispered. These two could be so clueless, thought Chichiri. The enchanted forest was staring them in the face. "They need some help, no da," he told the horse as he gave the animal a hard whack on the behind.  
  
The terrified horse took off into the trees.  
  
"Come back, you dumb animal!" shouted Miaka when she saw what was happening. She and Tamahome continued to call out the command as they chased their transportation into the woods. Little did they realize that the dumb animal had just transported them into the Enchanted Forest.  
  
~*~  
  
Not too far away, nearing the base of the mountain was Hotohori. With him were six of the best Royal Palace Guards. It had not taken them long to find Miaka and Tamahome's tracks. The trail had led them through the Konan country side, across vast plains, and to the foot of Mt. Leikaku.  
  
Judging by the tracks left, Miaka and Tamahome had been in a hurry. Now, however, the tracks reflected a slower pace indicating a desire to stop. Hotohori was certain that they were camped somewhere on this side of Mt. Leikaku.  
  
"Wait here. I must talk to them alone."  
  
The captain looked concern. "Sir, we are sworn to protect you. What if they inadvertently lead you into a trap?"  
  
"Do not worry, Captain Shang. If I do not return by dawn you may come after me. Until then you are under strict orders to remain here."  
  
From beneath the folds of his jacket Hotohori retrieved two black vials. Mitsukake had handed them to him just as he was about to leave the palace. "You may need this," the healer had said. When Hotohori had tried to find out more, all the man would say was, "it's an antidote. Two drops should be enough to revive, if the need arises." Hotohori hadn't had time to press for more information.  
  
Now he did the same. He passed one bottle to Captain Shang and repeated the instruction. Returning the other vial to his jacket, Hotohori rode off into the mountain night.  
  
~*~  
  
Meanwhile somewhere in between the Konan countryside and the vast plains a lone figure on horseback trotted through the same starlit night.  
  
"Just my luck," Nuriko complained to the sky. "Out of all the fine horseflesh in the Royal Stables, I had to pick Jack the Stubborn Ass." As if he comprehended the insult, Nuriko's mount stalled for the hundredth time.  
  
It was a battle of wills. Man against animal. Or in this case, woman against donkey. Through the course of the evening, she and Jack had engaged in staring contests, name calling, and mud slinging. Now it was time to get serious. Nuriko gritted her teeth and rolled up her sleeves. Adopting a very unladylike stance she bent and picked up her opponent. "I am getting to Hotohori even if I have to carry the blasted beast all the way there," she informed her burden as much as herself.  
  
So engaged in her endeavor and sweet thoughts of Emperor Enchanting was Nuriko that she didn't notice the extra shadow following her. Neither did she notice the printed cape that swept around her in the dark. Nope, the ground looked the same and Jack weighed as much as he always did. How was she to know magic forces were at work?  
  
Though the ground may have seemed the same, the scenery around her had changed. The horizon was no longer a clean line between earth and sky. The line was now broken my growing mounds and the jagged peaks of the foothills of Mt Leikaku. Chichiri's magic had teleported her pass the Royal guards, and minutes away from the Emperor.  
  
~*~  
  
About the same time, Miaka and Tamahome were nearing the heart of the Enchanted Forest. They had given up trying to find their horse.  
  
"Whose bright idea was it to leave the food on the horse," Miaka complained. She sent a scathing look towards Tamahome.  
  
"Don't look at me. How was I supposed to know that the thing would take off like that?"  
  
Miaka wasn't satisfied with the explanation, so she hit him anyway, before she stormed off.  
  
"I just knew it. I just knew she would get cranky," Tamahome thought to himself. His hand went to the private stash of candy bars he kept in his jacket. He had saved them from his trip to Miaka's world.  
  
"I should just leave her to sulk by herself. It was her idea to come here." Tamahome glanced at his brooding girlfriend's back. "But she looks so pitiful," his resolve was softening. Miaka chose that moment to let out loud sniff. With that Tamahome's internal debate was over. He walked to her and tangled a bar in front of her.  
  
Miaka had been prepared to ignore him, but when she saw the treasured treat her mood instantly changed. She grabbed it out of his hand ripped the wrapper off like someone on the brink of starvation. She took a huge bite of slightly warm and silky chocolate accompanied by a sigh. With her mouth still full, she planted sloppy brown kisses all over Tamahome's face. "Miaka, eat or kiss, but not both at the same time."  
  
Miaka quickly devoured the entire bar.  
  
"Is that your priority?"  
  
Tamahome turned to examine Miaka's progress. She was licking her lips and making sure she got every last bit of chocolate on her fingers.  
  
"You missed some." Tamahome pointed to the chocolate kiss on the side of his cheek. Miaka got the hint and leaned in to remove the mark. She placed a hand on his chest and another on his belt to brace herself. It was the biggest mistake Tamahome could have made. Miaka's hand had landed directly on the rest of the stash; her other loosen the cloth belt causing the chocolate bars to fall out.  
  
"Hey, you've been holding out on me." Miaka's face was beginning to steam.  
  
Tamahome knew the signs. "See ya," he said as he started running. Miaka gave chase. She launched herself into a flying tackle. The attack hit Tamahome squarely on the back, sending them both crashing down into a bed of leaves. A mist of magic spores creaked a cloud around the pair. Miaka changed tactics. She employed Killer Lips Hidden Mitsurugi Style.  
  
("This is going better than I planned, no da.")  
  
Wild kisses turned into lazy touches as the psychedelic mushrooms did their work. Soon all movement ceased, save the gentle rise and fall of slumber's breath.  
  
Chichiri left them as they were - Miaka's head pillowed on Tamahome's chest, his arms draped around her like a strong blanket.  
  
~*~  
  
Hotohori had steadily followed the tracks Miaka and Tamahome's horse had left until they abruptly stopped when he heard a familiar voice.  
  
"Emperor Hotohori, I'm so glad I found you." (Jack was still riding piggy- back.)  
  
"Oh no, not Princess Kourin. Doesn't she ever give up?" In a panic, he took to woods ahead of him.  
  
"Hotohori, wait up. Don't leave me here alone." Nuriko ditched Jack to chase her beloved Emperor.  
  
Once Nuriko disappeared among the trees, a faint red light descended, cutting the Enchanted Forest off from the rest of the world.  
  
"Let the fun begin," announced Chichiri.  
  
  
  
  
  
Taiitsu-kun: And so ends the third act in this Ridiculous Play  
  
  
  
  
  
A/n: Special thanks to all the reviewers. Keep those comments coming. 


	4. The Setup

Chapter 4: The Set-Up  
  
  
  
  
  
"Hotohori, my love, where are you?" Nuriko's distinct voice fell on the emperor's frustrated ears. Oh, would that woman just give up already. He had even tried to send his horse off in the opposite direction as a decoy. It had worked for a while, but the horse was too damn loyal and had come back to its master. Hotohori needed to shake his faithful tail soon so he could continue his search for Miaka. The thought made him sigh with longing. "Miaka."  
  
~*~  
  
On the other side of the forest, Tasuki had settled in for an evening of peace and quiet away from his five sisters. "No more talk about clothes, weight, and luvvv." He made a disgusted look before he wiggled into a more comfortable position against his chosen tree. "Ahhh. The Enchanted Forest where no one ever comes. Now I'll get a much deserved nap."  
  
A sudden wind rustled through the trees. An eerie figure flashed in and out between the shadowy leaves.  
  
"Who goes there?" "I'm warning you. I'm skilled in all forms of fighting: boxing, kung-fu, judo, karate, jujitsu, taekwondo. you name it." Tasuki's voice held steady even though his knees were shaking like crazy.  
  
Tasuki whipped out his tessen and had it ready and waiting. When the figure appeared again he yelled "Rekka Shien!!!" Flames shot out of the fan, but the blast of fire simply went through the figure.  
  
"What the hell?!?" Tasuki waited for an answer. None came.  
  
"I must be hallucinating. This is all just a bad dream," he tried to reassure himself. "That's it. No more egg rolls before bed." He almost succeeded but remembered that he wasn't sleeping.  
  
"Wait a minute, I'm not." Tasuki turned and came face to face with Chichiri. "Aaaahhhhhh!!! *deep breath* AAAHHHHHH!!!"  
  
Chichiri held up a hand to Tasuki's mouth. "Your breath stinks, no da." That shut Tasuki up.  
  
"Wh-what are you?"  
  
"A humble monk, no da." Chichiri gave him one of his permanent moronic grins. "You, my impetuous friend, are going to help me change history, no da."  
  
"How?"  
  
"With this." Chichiri held up a single red poppy bud.  
  
"That's it. A flower's going to change the course of history?" Tasuki was skeptical. His voice conveyed both disbelief and mockery.  
  
"Hang on to it, will you. Follow me." Chichiri led him deeper into the forest. They passed the sleeping lovers in their little grove. When Tasuki made the comment, "ohh, they're so cute," he got hit on the head by Chichiri.  
  
"Shhh. We'll deal with them later. There's other business to take care of now." He was leading Tasuki to the circular path Hotohori and Nuriko had been covering for close to an hour.  
  
"Wait here." Chichiri left Tasuki behind some bushes and disappeared before his reluctant accomplice could complain.  
  
Coming towards the hiding place was Hotohori walking next to the loyal, royal horse. "Finally," he thought, "I think I've lost her." He stopped right in front of Tasuki's bush. Hotohori looked around and frowned. His surroundings were both familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. "I think I've lost myself." The disoriented emperor continued on his way.  
  
Chichiri reappeared beside a startled Tasuki. He pointed to Hotohori. "There he goes, you idiot. Knock him out."  
  
"Me? Why do I have to do it?" Chichiri was ignoring him. "Hey, who are you anyway? Who do you think you are, bossing me around like this? I'm the leader of the Mt. Leikaku Bandits. That's a very important position, ya know."  
  
"No da."  
  
"Whatever," was his retort, but for some reason, Tasuki obeyed the original command. As quietly as possible Tasuki stalked Hotohori until the right opportunity presented itself. Tasuki pulled out his tessen and mumbled, "I can't believe I'm doing this," before he conked his victim on his royal head. Hotohori slumped into the nearby grass in a very dignified and flattering manner. Tasuki stopped to examine his work. "Hmm, not bad. He looks like one of those nude paintings - just with the clothes still on."  
  
"We can take care of that." Chichiri popped up behind Tasuki.  
  
Tasuki's heart jumped into his throat. "Stop doing that already. You could give a guy a heart attack."  
  
"Don't worry. It's not your heart I want to mess with. Now strip the Emperor will ya."  
  
"Oh no. I may not like girls, but I sure as hell don't like boys either."  
  
"You're a chicken, no da."  
  
"I am not," and just to prove it he stomped off to Hotohori. He had the emperor stripped down to the waist before he realized what he was doing. "That's it. That's as far as I'll go." Tasuki got up and stubbornly crossed his hands in front of him.  
  
"Very well. He looks pretty, no da."  
  
Tasuki looked down at his work, cocked his head to the side. "Yeah, he does look even prettier with his shirt off. Ewww, what am I saying?" Tasuki made a gagging noise and spat as if his life depended upon it. He was still trying to shake the thought from his head when Chichiri interrupted him.  
  
"Come on, we have more work to do." Chichiri was already walking towards Miaka and Tamahome. Tasuki trailed behind complaining. "What is this 'we' business? So far I've done all the work. As far as I'm concern there is no we. There's only you and me."  
  
"Well then. YOU need to carry Miaka over to Hotohori, no da." Chichiri pointed down at Miaka's sleeping form.  
  
"This shouldn't be too hard." Tasuki bent down to pick the Maiden up. He got as far as the picking.  
  
"Well lift her up already."  
  
"I am," Tasuki snapped through gritted teeth. With much effort he finally got Miaka over his shoulders. "Hmph. This girl must weigh a bloody ton."  
  
"Hurry up. Nuriko approaches."  
  
"Oh shove a cork in it, will ya?" Tasuki unceremoniously dumped Miaka's body on top of Hotohori's.  
  
"Perfect," commented Chichiri just before he covered Tasuki with his magic cloak. "Now shut up, no da." Tasuki complied without a murmur.  
  
It was just in time as Nuriko chose that moment to emerge from behind a tree. As if by some special radar, she headed directly towards Hotohori.  
  
She smelled his perfume before she even saw him. "Oh, Emperor, I've found y." She was shocked silent upon the seeing Miaka snuggled on Hotohori's chest. The pair was illuminated by a beam of pure moonlight as if to show heaven's approval. Shock turned into hurt. With tears in her eyes, Nuriko turned and ran back into the dark of the forest.  
  
"Stop her," Chichiri whispered hoarsely into Tasuki's ear.  
  
"Now you have me hitting girls. What next? Stealing candy from a baby?" he challenged. He was staring straight at Chichiri's ever smiling face but was sure it now had a sarcastic slant to it.  
  
"Never mind. She can't leave the forest anyway. You'll just have a harder time finding her, no da."  
  
"You're a sad, sick little man."  
  
  
  
Taiitsu-kun: And so ends the fourth act in this Outrageous Play.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/n: thanks for the reviews, keep 'em coming. 


	5. The MixUp

A/n: This chapter is dedicated to AnimeFreak.  
Chapter 5: The Mix-up  
"Time to spice things up."  
  
Tasuki made a smooth entrance using the flower bud as his microphone. "What do you think? I could be Poppy Spice." He struck a pose a la Spice Girls.  
  
"You don't have the curves, no da," commented Chichiri blandly. "Now get back to work. Night will not last forever. Put a drop of poppy dew in Tamahome's eyes."  
  
Tasuki grudgingly went to work. "Hmm, which one is Tamahome, again?" Tasuki looked around, but Chichiri was gone. "Looks like I have three choices here. I could wait for Smiling Monk Man to pop back, I could use the eeny- meeny-miney-moe method, or I could do this."  
  
Tasuki dripped poppy dew into Hotohori's eyes then walked over to Tamahome and did the same. That should do it he thought as he walked off to find a spot to finish his nap.  
  
~*~ Midnight, or so said the full moon. A cool breeze to revive sleeping lovers.  
  
Tamahome woke with a soft sigh. "Miaka," he said with a smile even before he opened his eyes. His arm closed in for a hug but only touched air. "Miaka?" Now he was fully awake. "Miaka! Where are you?" Tamahome unnecessarily checked their makeshift bed. The girl was nowhere to be seen. Tamahome widen his search drawn by a whisper of movement.  
  
The longer he followed the closer he got. Pretty soon a figure was in sight. Tamahome increased his speed and called out to the mystery girl. She turned and his eyes locked onto the young woman's hazel eyes. Fireworks went off in his heart.  
  
"Oh Nuriko," he greeted, the lustful intent clearly evident. In a second he was beside her running his hands over her arms.  
  
"Get your hands off me, Tamahome." When he didn't stop she continued, "I'm warning you. Don't make hurt you."  
  
"My sweet, you could never hurt me."  
  
"Wanna bet?" Nuriko's hands fisted at her side. What had gotten into Tamahome? With a quick shrug she escaped his light hold.  
  
"My love is strong. She plays hard to get."  
  
"Get a grip, Tamahome." Then remembering his touch added, "maybe not. Just keep your distance, okay?"  
  
"Okay. Anything you want, Princess." He paused as if some great secret had been revealed to him. "That's right. You're a princess. Princesses have a lot of money, don't they?"  
  
"Only you could think of money at a time like this." ~*~  
  
Meanwhile Miaka dreamed of her dear Tamahome and of waking in his arms. Her body responded to the thought by producing a lustful sigh and restoring consciousness to Miaka. Her hands were the first to gain function. Her fingers walked over Tamahome's chest caressing warm flesh.  
  
Something was wrong. Something felt different. Her eyes fluttered open. The first thing they saw was bare chest. Lots of it. Oh my. She had heard of overnight growth spurts, but this was ridiculous. Her eyes traveled down to bellybutton. It was hairy. Then her gaze went upward. Long dark hair curled around broad shoulders. Hair that shimmered like.  
  
"Hotohori," she gasped in shock.  
  
What am I doing sleeping with Hotohori? Where is Tamahome? Was he all right? What is going on? The thoughts came all at once running into each other. The most important one was to find Tamahome. She needed to make sure he was fine. Carefully, she got up off Hotohori and embarked on her quest.  
  
~*~  
  
Miaka grabbed Tamahome's hand. She was shocked by the expression he had when he turned to look at her.  
  
"Do I know you?" he said derisively.  
  
"Tamahome," she sobbed softly to the back of his hand. He had returned his attention to Nuriko. "Tamahome, why are you doing this?" she pleaded.  
  
He was ignoring her, for he only had eyes for the purple goddess before him. Realizing this Miaka turned her attention to Nuriko.  
  
"Nuriko? What kind of spell have you cast on Tamahome?"  
  
"Get real, Miaka. You're the Priestess of Suzaku, not me."  
  
Miaka found that hard to believe when Tamahome was trying to devour Nuriko's beauty mark with sloppy kisses. He had one hand alternating between cradling the back of Nuriko's head and blocking Nuriko's attempts to get his lips off her face while the other was straining against the death hold Miaka had on it. She had refused to let go of it when he disregarded her.  
  
While Miaka was trying to hold on to Tamahome, Nuriko was trying to do the exact opposite. All her attempts however could not dissuade Tamahome's ardent advances. Finding no other choice, Nuriko hit him on the head. He went down like a sack of lead hormones. Seeing her chance to escape Nuriko took it without even a cursory goodbye.  
  
Miaka didn't even notice, for now she could tend her errant love in peace. "Once you wake up, we'll realize this is all just a bad, bad dream," she cooed as she stroked the hair off his brow.  
  
~*~  
  
Nuriko found a small pool of water. "Great! I can wash Tamahome's drool off my face." She wondered how Miaka could stand it. The guy had serious morning breath.  
  
The water felt cool against Nuriko's skin. It was refreshing and relaxing at the same time. The water was so inviting. Nuriko took a long deep breath of the fresh night air. It was actually quite warm. A quick dip in this secluded pool would help ease the tension that was building up in her neck and shoulders. She needed to be calm and serene when she found the Emperor again. If Miaka could seduce him with her rash, tomboyish ways, she could lure him back with perfect noble grace. Princess Kourin could be just as tempting as the Priestess of Suzaku.  
  
These were the thoughts and plans that occupied Nuriko's mind as she stripped. "Ahhh," she sighed with pleasure as she walked into the pool. The water greeted her like a lover, hugging her every curve and touching every inch of skin beneath its rippling surface.  
  
~*~  
  
Soft splashing and feminine laughter drew Hotohori towards the pond. He had woken early with a nasty headache. He couldn't quite remember how he had got the headache or what he was doing in the forest. All he knew was that he was searching for something, someone - a special someone. With that mission in mind, Hotohori stepped into the clearing surrounding a tennyo's moonlit pool.  
  
Hotohori was stopped in his tracks. "Can it be?" For surely this water nymph must be real. "It must be true. There is one as beautiful as me, and it is she." Hotohori's heart was skipping and so were his feet. At the sound the creature turned to directly face him, and Hotohori knew he was not dreaming.  
  
"Princess Kourin," he called to her, his arms outstretched ready to embrace as soon as she was within reach. Without a care he lifted the naked Nuriko out of the water.  
  
Nuriko's heart fluttered. She wasn't sure whether it was desire or indignation. But, oh, Hotohori was so strong, wasn't he. The muscular arms which held sword in battle were now caressing her.  
  
With regret Nuriko regained her senses. This must some sort of joke. Just an hour ago Hotohori was with Miaka. They were trying to make a fool out of her. Why did they have to hit where she was most vulnerable? Why?  
  
"Your Majesty, please don't do this. Let me go."  
  
"Why? I've finally found what I've been searching for. It's you, my love."  
  
Words like that chipped at Nriko's resolve. How she wanted to believe his words, but they could not possibly be true. Still she would not believe Hotohori could be so cruel. Nuriko shivered at the thought.  
  
Thinking his precious princess was cold, Hotohori stripped off his outer coat and wrapped it around her. Nuriko had to hide a laugh despite the situation. On Hotohori, the cloak fell full length, so now that she was wearing it several inches of cloth piled at her feet. Nuriko had always dreamed of having Hotohori give her something this personal, but she had never considered this particular detail.  
  
Hotohori took advantage of her lighten mood by leaning in for a kiss. Nuriko stopped him, his lips a breath away. "We can't," she whispered half- heartedly, fantasy battling with reality.  
  
"Whatever you say, my lovely dove. We could stay right here and admire ourselves all night." To prove his sincerity, he pulled Nuriko down with him as he lounged by the edge of the water. "Don't we make a beautiful couple."  
  
Hotohori was being such a gentleman. How could she have suspected him of trickery, Nuriko asked herself. Giving in to her longing, she moved closer to Hotohori. He tucked a damp strand of purple hair behind her ear and whispered a wicked suggestion.  
  
"Emperor!" Nuriko stood in shock, but a deep blush colored her cheek.  
  
"You can call me Hori Hori."  
  
"Hey. That's my pet name for you," Miaka exclaimed from behind them. She was being dragged by Tamahome, whose hand was still firmly cluthched in her own.  
  
"Nuriko. Princess, I've been looking everywhere for. I like a girl who plays hard to get." He gave her a lecherous wink.  
  
"Hey!" cried an insulted Miaka. She turned her attention to her so-called friend. "Nuriko, wasn't Tamahome enough? Why did you have to take Hotohori as well?"  
  
"What about you?" Nuriko snapped back. "What were you doing sleeping with Hotohori. You know I like him." She finished the retort by repeating Maika's own words, "Wasn't Tamahome enough?"  
  
Miaka turned red with embarrassment and guilt. They were unnecessary as Tamahome and Hotohori were blivious to their conversation.  
  
Indeed, they both seemed to be bewitched by Nuriko. Each held one of her hands and was looking at her with puppy dog eyes.  
  
"Nuriko," Tamahome beckoned as he pulled her towards him.  
  
"Kourin," Hotohori countered.  
  
"Princess." *tug*  
  
"Queen of my heart." *yank*  
  
"My love." *jerk*  
  
"My lovely dove." *wrench*  
  
Miaka was left to gawk as the two men began a tug of war with Nuriko playing the role of rope.  
Taiitsu-kun: And so ends the fourth act in this Scandalous Play.  
A/n: I finally got done with this chapter. There are just not enough hours in a day. Now that you know the power of the poppy flower, it's time to vote. Who ends up with whom? You help decide.  
  
Thanks to Miaka Sukunami and Violettegal for giving me a push to finish this chapter. Keep the reviews coming.  
  
Q/A: there is a reason for all this madness. The course of true love never did run smoothly.so read on to find out. 


	6. The Switch

A/n: A thousand apologies for taking so long to post this chapter. I actually had most of it written in my notebook, but haven't gotten around to typing it up until now. It was a case of lazy-itis caused by having too much backlog schoolwork. Anyway, may I now present the next act in this curious play.  
Chapter 6: The Switch  
"You're a fool, no da."  
  
Tasuki was rudely awakened from nap "Wh-what do you want?" he asked the blur standing over him. "Oh. It's you," he dead-panned when his vision cleared. He was now standing face to face with Chichiri. "I did what you told me to. Now leave me alone."  
  
"What exactly did you do? Everything's a mess, no da."  
  
"Everything's a mess?" Tasuki looked around. Everything seemed fine to him. The trees were exactly where they were before his nap. "You know what, if you're such a know-it-all, why don't you tell me what I did." Tasuki resisted the urge to poke Chichiri in the chest, but the challenge in his question was clearly evident.  
  
"Mortals."  
  
"Idiotic Smiling Monk."  
  
"Temperamental Red-head."  
  
"Why you.my hair's not red! It's - it's. " ugh, how satisfying it would be to strangle the bossy monk.  
  
"Stop. This is getting us nowhere," Chichiri said as he stepped aside. "Tamahome is suppose to fall for Nuriko. That was the plan.  
  
"Why? I thought that Tamahome guy was with the heavy chick."  
  
"The emperor is in love with the Priestess. She has feelings for him as well. A union between Seven Star Emperor and Priestess of Suzaku would be powerful, no da."  
  
"A powerful union," Tasuki repeated blindly. "But if that's the case, why did you order me to drag the *couch* cow *cough*, ahem, priestess away?"  
  
"Do I have to explain everything to you?"  
  
Tasuki continued to stare at Chichiri.  
  
"Listen closely. I don't want to repeat myself, no da." Tasuki leaned towards the monk, his ear positioned in front of Chichiri's mouth. "The better to hear you," he explained.  
  
Seeing that he was serious and had his undivided attention, Chichiri continued. "Tamahome's love is blinding Miaka. She cannot make the right choice if she believes Tamahome still loves her. By turning his affection on to Nuriko, Miaka will turn to the Emperor for comfort, and the Emperor would lose his pesky thorn-in-the-side. You, however, have messed up everything, no da."  
  
Though Chichiri's face was still a smiling mask, Tasuki cringed back in guilt. He swallowed to clear the lumped forming in his throat. "Can't you just reverse whatever spell you put on them."  
  
Chichiri looked happy enough, but Tasuki was sure the monk was shooting poisonous darts at him. It surprised him when Chichiri cheerfully answered without irritation.  
  
"Since the doing was your mistake, you shall do the undoing, no da." He handed Tasuki a blue poppy. "This flower will counteract the red bud's effects. But before you can apply it, the subjects must be asleep. Miaka has a sleeping potion in a tiny white vial that will put all four of them to sleep. One drop each. And remember, the blue poppy's dew is for Hotohori's eyes only." With that Chichiri vanished.  
  
"Here we go again. Now, what color was that vial?"  
  
Tasuki scratched his head as he went in search of Miaka. He found all four of them beside the lake. He was just wondering how to get the vial from Miaka when things started to heat up.  
  
Tamahome and Hotohori had gotten into a push-shove contest. Not wanting to lower himself to Tamahome's ruffian level, Hotohori had started throwing insults instead of punches.  
  
"Nuriko doesn't like you *poke* she likes me." Tamahome pointed to himself in a manly manner.  
  
"But I saw her first," Hotohori insisted. Oh, he was sorely tempted to forget his royal upbringing and knock out this lesser being.  
  
"That doesn't mean she likes you better, *push* cos she likes me." He shoved his rival again to emphasize his point.  
  
"Why would Princess Kourin choose you, a thief, when she can have me, the Emperor of Konan."  
  
"Exactly, Nuriko wants a walk on the wild side. She needs a tour guide like me, not a son of a ."  
  
"That does it. No one insults my mother and gets away with it." The first punch connected squarely with Tamahome's jaw.  
  
While the boys were settling business, the girls were having an argument of their on which had escalated into an all out cat fight.  
  
Hotohori's robe which Nuriko was wearing now hung off her left shoulder ripped to tatters. The outfit remained on her only by a thin strip across her right shoulder and the belt around her waist. But no one seemed to notice except Tasuki who was enjoying a clear view of her exposed cleavage. Miaka fared no better. Her own gown had several gashes, the outermost layer having been totally snatched off. It now lay on the ground a few feet from Tasuki's hiding place. He could see the vial sticking out of an inside pocket. Carefully, he managed to crawl undetected amongst the quarrelling quartet's feet. Then as quietly as he came, Tasuki returned to his hiding place.  
  
Safely hidden behind a bush, Tasuki planned the next step of his mission. Applying a special martial arts technique, he used his tessen to fan drops of sleeping potion into his victims' mouths as they yelled at each other.  
  
"Cad" *yawn* "Bitch" *yawn* "Louse" *yawn* "One-eyed camel sitting in a pile of . *yawn*"  
  
Together the four lovers slumped to the ground in a heap.  
  
"Am I good or what," Tasuki bragged as he polished his nails on the front of his shirt. "Now to finsh this job so I can get back to my nap."  
  
Tasuki pulled the blue bud out of his pants as he walked around the slumbering lovers. "So which one of you is going to be dewed?" He stopped above Hotohori. "I know the monk guy said I should dew you, but I'm not sure." Tasuki continued his walk as he pondered on the situation. "Miaka like Tamahome. Tamahome used to like Miaka. Why mess with that? Nuriko likes the Emperor guy. Emperor likes Nuriko now. Why mess with that? But if I give the dew to Hotohori, like smiling man says, he'll be in love with Miaka again. She likes him, too. Why mess with that? Who should I dew?"  
  
Tasuki contemplated his dilemna until finally resolving the problem in his mind. He bent down a let a single glistening drop of moisture fall from the blue bud into the eyes of a sleeping lover.  
Taiitsu-kun: And so ends the sixth act in this Preposterous Play.  
A/n: this chapter/act sucks doesn't it. Well I figured a crappy installment was better than nothing. Act seven should be the last in this play, but it probably will be a while before it gets posted. Too much other stuff on my mind lately.  
  
Thanks to all for reading and reviewing. ~TheDuck 


	7. The Wedding

Chapter 7: the Wedding  
"That fool had better gotten it right this time," thought Chichiri aloud as he shimmered into appearance. Tasuki was nowhere to be seen, but the four lovers remained still asleep. Beside Tamahome lay the blue poppy bud. "Good," he remarked satisfied.  
  
"Time to rise and shine lovely mortals." Chichiri began to fade. The last glimpse of him was accompanied by a loud crash of thunder in the early morning sky.  
  
Miaka was the first to awaken, her stomach growling. "Breakfast, need breakfast," she mumbled.  
  
From behind her Tamahome complained, "Miaka, was that your stomach growling? It's so loud it woke me up."  
  
Next to them Nuriko began to stir. "I've had the weirdest dream."  
  
"Me, too," interjected Miaka. They exchanged sympathetic glances.  
  
"It was more like a nightmare, really. Emperor Hotohori was playing a trick on me, and Tamahome tried to attack me," Realizing what she had just said, Nuriko backed away from Tamahome. "You don't still love me do you?" she asked warily.  
  
Tamahome took a moment to consider. When he look up, Nuriko could tell he thought she was crazy. "Of course not, Nuriko. I love Miaka." To prove it he turned to his fiancé and gave a passionate kiss. Miaka returned the kiss with equal ardor as the insecurities of the previous evening slipped away with each passing second.  
  
Three minutes later, they were still at it. "Enough already." The pair was giving Nuriko goose-bumps.  
  
Her statement had no affect on the amorous couple. They were, however, loud enough to wake the emperor.  
  
"Princess Kourin, is that your lovely voice I hear?" he sighed huskily. Nuriko turned her attention to him. A smile crossed his face even though his eyes remained shut. "It must be, for I smell your sweet fragrance."  
  
Nuriko held the closest bit of fabric up to her nose and sniffed. She smelt like the dirt on which she sat.  
  
Hotohori's hand blindly reached out, but still managed to catch a lock of Nuriko's hair which he rubbed between his fingers. "Yes, it can be none other than my amethyst goddess." With a gentle tug, he brought her lips to his. [censored: cuts have been made by author's request so that this fanfic might return to a PG13 rating]  
  
'Oh yeah, the Emperor can kiss' was the only coherent thought in Nuriko's brain. With her mind in a euphoric haze, she almost missed her hot lip's next words.  
  
"If only I could wake up to these sensations every morning - your sound, your smell, your feel, your taste, and most of all your sight." Now Hotohori's eyes opened so he could feast on Nuriko's beauty.  
  
She was just how he remembered in his dream. Her expression, however, was not what he expected. Nuriko looked stunned. Her eyes could not contain the mix of joy, hurt, disbelief, and confusion.  
  
"What is wrong? Don't you wish to be with me?"  
  
"Yes," the affirmation escaped before she could catch it. That was her heart talking. Nuriko need to think with her head, but she could not bring herself to take back the agreement.  
  
"Then you will be my bride. My Empress."  
  
"Why would you want someone like me when you can have the Maiden?" Nuriko had to ask the question, if only to settle her disbelief.  
  
"Why wouldn't I? Don't you think I am a gorgeous Emperor and deserve the best?"  
  
Nuriko couldn't help but feel flattered at his remark: she answered automatically. "Of course, my Adonis Emperor."  
  
"Then it's settled." He resumed kissing Nuriko, and this time she put all her concentration into matching her Emperor of Kisses.  
  
"Ewwww," Miaka's face was screwed up in disgust. "I think I just saw Hotohori's tongue go down her throat." It was meant to look as if she was whispering to Tamahome, but the comment was loud enough to cause Nuriko to jump back. The princess was blushing so hard that she could have the moon thought the sun was coming up early.  
  
Miaka had no intention of hiding her utter amusement. She laughed so hard that she was slipped right through Tamahome's arms and was wiggling on the ground. "N-n-nuriko-o, y-y-you *ha ha* look l-like a ap-apple *convulses in more laughter*."  
  
The last jibe snapped Nuriko out of her embarrassed stupor. She glanced at a rather smug Hotohori who was doing nothing to defend her and Tamahome who looked like he was getting ready to watch Saturday Night Live. "Men," she muttered before turning her counterattack on Miaka. "What about you, Miss Spit Exchange." Nuriko knew she had hit the right nerve when her opponent stopped laughing and stood up ramrod straight. "That's right, I have some experience with Tamahome's kisses as you recall." Nuriko pointed a patch of his slobber on her clothes.  
  
Now it was Miaka's turn to look embarrassed. Neither of them took their eyes off the other, but Nuriko was certain Tamahome was blushing as well and Hotohori was looking on with his superior act. It was his way of silently cheering her on.  
  
Miaka sized up the situation pretty fast. Not to be outdone, she continued the finger-pointing. "Don't act all innocent with me, Nuriko. You're no princess when you're trying to get your man. I'm pretty sure we'll find some hard evidence on Hotohori later today."  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about, Miaka. For a High Priestess/Maiden, you do seem to have your mind in the gutter a lot." Nuriko said it in her most snotty personality, but merriment sparkled in her eyes and mischief lingered at the corners of her upturned lips.  
  
And so it went until everyone was laughing and pretty soon the men joined in with overly dramatic displays of chivalry. They even went as far as staging a mock duel to defend the honor of their respective ladies.  
  
Exhausted but filled with happiness, both couples laid down on the sweet grass to watch what was left of the morning's sunrise. The soft light lulled them into a state of blissful rest.  
  
~*~  
  
"Quick, come quick." The scout knew Captain Shang would not be too please with his insubordination, still the situation seemed urgent.  
  
"What is it?" The question was said like a command and sounded impatient. Without answering the scout led the Royal guards to a clearing where two pairs of lovers lay motionless on a bed grass. What was most shocking was the fact that all four of them were stark naked.  
  
"They look so serene they could be dead," someone whispered. Another one replied, "Yeah, but at least the died happy," pointing out their suggestive positions and the hint of smiles on each of their faces.  
  
Captain Shang looked glaringly at the two guards then turned his killer stare to the scout.  
  
"It wasn't me?" the meek scout tried adding a nervous laugh to the end.  
  
Captain Shang was just reaching for the vial that contained the sleeping potion antidote, when the four lovers began to stir.  
  
~*~  
  
"Good grief, what trouble these couples be. Boy am I glad I stayed single."  
  
And finally Tasuki was able to finish his nap in the now serene Enchanted Forest. The four lovers had been escorted back to the Palace after a brief explanation for which Tasuki was glad he didn't have to hear. His last thoughts were about the absence of the lovers' clothes; he had a pretty good idea.  
  
~*~  
  
"Hear ye, Hear ye, on this day the Emperor of Konan weds Princess Kourin and the Priestess of Suzaku weds the Seven Star Warrior Tamahome in a joint ceremony to be performed by the Venerable Monk Chichiri." Keisuke read the herald's words with mixed emotions. Of course he was happy for his sister; had marrying the man she loved and who loved her in return. But then again what big brother wouldn't want an emperor of men as his brother-in-law?  
  
A moment later Tetsuya and Yui joined him in the room. "Did we miss it yet? Yui asked anxiously.  
  
"What are you talking about? It's a book. All you have to do is flip back a few pages."  
  
"Tetsuya, shut up. It's starting." Keisuke's eyes never left the book nor did his hands leave the book's covers, so Yui and Tetsuya had to read over his shoulders. Together they followed the wedding as it unfolded on the pages of the Book of the Four Gods. At the appropriate time during the ceremony Yui began to cry and Keisuke let his eyes glisten. Tetsuya's were covered by his usual eyewear, but rumor has it they got a little shiny as well.  
  
~*~  
  
"And they lived happily ever after."  
  
"That's it?!" Keisuke shouted into the book. "That's my baby sister you're writing about. I need to know more." He paused as if waiting for the book to respond. Nothing. Keisuke slammed the book onto the desk and stormed off muttering something about censorship.  
  
Yui was looking all wistful. "That was a beautiful wedding." She looked back at the book sprawled on the table. "They should change the title of that thing to 'The Book of the Four Lovers'."  
  
"I don't think so," Tetsuya said, but he put his arms around Yui and led her somewhere more private.  
  
~*~  
  
Author: And so ends the seventh act in this Glorious (I wish) Play.  
A/n : Hoped you liked/enjoyed it. It might have taken a while, but I've finally finished my senior research paper and as today is a public holiday I had a chance to write the final act in my little Curious Play. Unfortunately I've run out of funny. Sorry if this chapter doesn't live up to the humor half of it's genre description. Anyway, please review, cos I like reading the reviews as much as writing the stories. 


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